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FROM BOYS II MEN By UMOJA Guest Writer Sitting alone, at home, I'm troubled. I think of our society and wonder: WHERE ARE THE MEN? I ask myself this perplexing question after a very challenging conversation with my 11-year old son, who is on the genesis of adolescence. Looking at our community, I see so many young men who are confused, without direction or purpose. I wonder, who will be there for them? Where are the mentors - the men of responsibility and standard? And, what do our women have to look forward to from these fathers, brothers and potential leaders? What are we doing to aid the sensitive dilemma of single-female parenting, which is on the rise in almost every community? As a single mother, myself, I only have theories to offer my son - when what he needs right now is practical action (in order to make sense of what manhood truly is). The journey from boys to men is one that our children must not travel alone. Too many boys have grown - yet failed to mature - because of the lack of male role within our homes and communities. Often, only negative issues concerning our men are portrayed, but I see something different. I see Kings, Leaders, Men of Integrity and Dignity - who love, protect and provide for their families. I see men of peace, not war, laden with potential and promise. I see youth that know how to treat women and elders with the utmost respect, focused on future plans and ready to take this world by storm. You might be asking yourself, “does UMOJA wear glasses?” No, I don’t. I do see our black men for who they are - they've adapted behaviours that aren't their own. If we, as a community, work together to provide programs that focus on re-teaching, re-minding and re-membering, our whole society will be affected in the most phenomenal way; I pray for our men of principle to rise to the call! An Afrikan proverb expresses that it takes two people to make a child...but a whole village to raise it; we, as Afrikan descendants, must adopt this mentality if our youth are to be given a fighting chance. I've researched mentoring groups like Big Brothers, for help in positively influencing my son. Unfortunately, I found out that the wait for a "Big Brother" is over a year; my son needs someone now! There are other agencies that cater to children, like YMCA and Boys & Girls Club’s; although these varied programs are excellent for children, I haven't found anything that specifically caters to the mental development of our young men - who've buried their will to live, dream, achieve and attain. But, a ray of light came in the form of Brenton P. Alleyne, founder of Alleyne’s Image Center - an environment that tends to men's esthetic needs, and so much more. One of Alleyne's main reasons for broadening the Center's concepts was due to a touching conversation he had with a young man in one of Toronto’s low-income areas, where Alleyne asked - “Where do you go from here?” The young man expressed that he was going back to a life of hustling, because that’s all he knew and didn't know any other options. This realization sparked the change that pushed Alleyne’s Image Center to address men's mental, emotional and spiritual matters, with the clear understanding that a brighter tomorrow is available today. We need to come together as that "village" and get involved. It’s your turn to help in building a strong, healthy and thriving community. The following are suggestions on how to get started: 1. Send a survey around your neighborhood - with the hopes of determining the needs of the youth - and attach a form for male volunteers. 2. Check your local library or community centre for info about rooms can be used to hold bi-weekly or monthly group sessions. 3. Make an 8-week pilot plan, to try the program out for a probationary time. 4. Based on the response from the survey, organize youth activities - trips, motivational speakers, art and educational programs. 5. Schedule to meet prior to each group session, to discuss objectives and mentoring. Divide tasks and set deadlines to meet them before the next session. 6. Mentor! Be the example that the youth need! Pour strength back into our community and help build our future leaders, fathers, and mighty men. We need to be united, as a people, and care enough about our future to do something tangible. What motivates you? Whatever it is, don’t just think about it - do something! Don’t just be blessed, be a blessing! UMOJA To receive Brenton Alleyne's weekly e-newsletter, "Expressions", e-mail brentonalleyne@hotmail.com). For more info on mentoring, or for sample surveys and volunteer forms, e-mail linkup@8Rooks.Com. |
